PS Vita & Arguing with Myself
The best thing about arguing with yourself is that you are bound to win. Well, most of the time anyway.
The PS Vita is only two weeks away and I’m still agonizing over whether or not to buy one at launch. The following heated conversation took place in my head, not more than an hour ago.
Me: I think we need a PS Vita.
Me: Are you taking the piss?
Me: No. It looks great.
Me: But we never play portables. We have stacks of PSP and DS games that we have barely touched.
Me: Hang on a second; I'm playing Resident Evil Revelations as we speak. Having a 3DS is already paying off.
Me: Pull the other one. What were you saying to me the other day about the Circle Pad Pro's battery life?
Me: I don't rightly recall.
Me: Spit it out you mute.
Me: OK! "480 hours? I'll never have to change the battery in this thing". So what? 480 hours is a long time to play anything.
Me: We played Skyrim for 100 hours in the last two months alone. Fuck, we played Final Fantasy XIII for 110 and didn't even particularly like that game.
Me: That was an accident.
Me: You were an accident.
Me: No need to get personal. Look, Amazon is doing a great bundle at the moment: Wi-Fi model, 8GB memory card and a choice of one of six games for £234.
Me: £234? Do you know how many PS3 games we could buy for that? How many nights out with friends?
Me: We don't have any friends.
Me: That's beside the point. £234 is a lot of money for something we don't need and probably won't play after the first month. Anyway, I thought Uncharted was the main reason we wanted a Vita, and that's not even included in the Amazon bundle.
Me: We'd have to buy that separately or we could just go for one of GAME's slightly more expensive bundles that include Golden Abyss.
Me: We might as well just buy one. It’s fate. Besides, we still have Rayman Origins and Lumines on pre-order after Amazon mistakenly listed them for £6 each.
Me: Yeah, that was a good day for us. Super value.
Me: Strike whilst the irons hot, right?
Me: Look, I realise we are eventually going to buy a Vita. But why not wait a year for the price to come down and for more quality games to arrive? There's a good reason why, a year down the line, no one remembers launch titles.
Me: You know what, YOU are what’s wrong with the video game industry. You love games, yet are reluctant to support the creators by making a full-price purchase. You wait around for systems and games to die so that you can snatch them up for next to nothing. You are a vulture. You are more abhorrent than online passes, worse than a David Jaffe quote, even.
Me: Fuck you. We owe Sony nothing. We didn't force them to make questionable decision after questionable decision with all things PS brand. They brought this upon themselves with expensive memory cards, UMD passports, then no UMD passports, and what's this shit I'm now hearing about SEN? Look around the living room. We can't move for Sony products, and don't you forget that we both shed a tear the day our PS3 fat died. When the Vita fails, it won't be our fault. By the way, have you lost weight recently?
Me: Yeah, I think so. Thanks for noticing.
Me: Not at all.
Me: It would just be nice to be on-board with a new console from day one, you know? There are few things more exciting than unwrapping and booting-up a new console for the very first time. We could even make an unboxing video and stick it on YouTube.
Me: Those videos do seem to be very popular and it would be a darn sight easier than banging out another 1000 word blog post. People really appreciate cardboard boxes and shoddy camera work.
Me: Exactly. We can also churn out day one impressions and send out lots of smart-arse tweets about how we have already got our Vita.
Me: That sounds like fun, but it still doesn't justify shelling out now for a Vita. We need to wait.
Me: No, we need to act. What if all the pre-order bundles start to disappear? I'm loading up Amazon now, and I've got my credit card ready.
Me: You really are a hopeless twat.
Me: But it has trophy support!
Me: Really? Why didn't you say so! Are they guaranteeing delivery for the 22nd?